14 January 2009

'Paki' and 'Raghead' officially no longer racist terms

After video of Prince Harry using both words emerged, royal brown-nosers have rallied round to clear the prince of any wrongdoing. It has been decided by senior government and military chiefs that both terms will retrospectively removed from the lexicon of offensive racist slurs and recategorized as harmless friendly banter. Consequently Harry will not be censured for use of the terms, and in fact has been praised by those hoping for knighthoods as a poster child for race relations.

Furthermore, some other terms popularly used by the prince have similarly had their meanings reclassified to head-off any future controversy.

1. N*gger - A gentleman who you are very friendly with and have a close working relationship with, and for whom you have the utmost respect and who might coincidentally have a darker than average skin tone
2. F*cking c*nt - A bit of a wag who is nevertheless quite lovable and well meaning
3. M*therf*cker - Any man known to have met Prince Diana on more than one occasion, or for more than 10 minutes on a single occasion

More info:
News of the World - Prince Harry's racist outbursts on video